I don't think I recognize the person I have become. I don't know who I am anymore.
I have been sick in bed for the past 4 days. Ever since I came back from Tunisia (yes, I was in Tunisia for 6 days, I will post about that later - the country is BEAUTIFUL)
Those who have known me for over 10 years (that's only one person really, the one person I am still close with) know that I shouldn't spend too much time alone. When I spend time alone, this gives me a chance to think and when I think, the outcome is never, ever good. It's usually twisted, and more often than not, far, far, far from reality.
Outcome: Huge argument with the boyfriend.
Anyway. Back to me. I honestly don't know this person sitting here typing this post. Because the person I knew to be me used to read a lot, used to write a lot...she used to cook. And she used to work out.
And all these things are things I no longer do. I no longer have it in me to do them, or maybe, I just no longer have the time to do them. I thought that as soon as I finish my master's degree, I'll have time to do whatever it is I wanted to do, but now that I work with the Germans, I barely have time to do anything. I am not complaining really, it's a very fulfilling job, but...you know?
Meet my little friend here, she's been keeping me company:
I have been sick in bed for the past 4 days. Ever since I came back from Tunisia (yes, I was in Tunisia for 6 days, I will post about that later - the country is BEAUTIFUL)
Those who have known me for over 10 years (that's only one person really, the one person I am still close with) know that I shouldn't spend too much time alone. When I spend time alone, this gives me a chance to think and when I think, the outcome is never, ever good. It's usually twisted, and more often than not, far, far, far from reality.
Outcome: Huge argument with the boyfriend.
Anyway. Back to me. I honestly don't know this person sitting here typing this post. Because the person I knew to be me used to read a lot, used to write a lot...she used to cook. And she used to work out.
And all these things are things I no longer do. I no longer have it in me to do them, or maybe, I just no longer have the time to do them. I thought that as soon as I finish my master's degree, I'll have time to do whatever it is I wanted to do, but now that I work with the Germans, I barely have time to do anything. I am not complaining really, it's a very fulfilling job, but...you know?
Meet my little friend here, she's been keeping me company:
Made from organic Egyptian cotton, (the fabric is dyed with natural dye!)
4 comments:
Now that is one cute friend and you sound like one fairly sad and thoughtful friend. In a way, I guess I'm in a similar position, simply because I have so much work to do now which is AMAZING and wonderful - but it's as if I can't slow down, sit down, read, think...
sorry to hear you are not well. sending you hugs and smiles.
Oh love, I'm sorry you're sick but you are still you... its all about balance when you finish your degree - balancing what you have to do (work) with what you want to do. Make the time to do these things, make lists of things that you have to do for yourself (read, write, cook...) and know that you still want to do them... you're still you. you just need to find the balance again.
sending you hugs and get well wishes x
Well I hate to state the obvious but we are not what we do. We are who we are and whatever the life road shapes us to be. Its normal to change to stop doing things you used to do but I bet that you are also doing things that you did not use to do. Which is totally okay. If you are not comfortable with yourself, try to surround yourself with people with positive impact on you even if you are busy i am sure you can virtually reach out to them. Yes, it is not the same but it will definitely help. Also, may be you have to remind yourself that your own company could also be fun :D Hope you feel better.
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