Wednesday, December 31, 2008

If 2008 should end anyway;

If for everytime I think (of you) my heart should sing, I will have composed a symphony by now.
Here is a piece of a little something I wrote last year:

I have one father.
One mother,
One mind,
One soul,
One heart,
I have two bodies.

I have one God.
One firm thought,
One belief,
I have two entities.

The very different people that exist within our being, the existence we are; the one we take so recklessly for granted. We were born to find this world, the miracle it is, ready for us, when we, the helpless human beings we are, were never prepared for it. The surprises and the shocks, the ups and downs, the hopes and their destruction- the menthol-like iciness of birth.
A mother holds her child with care and pride, thinking I helped bring this like into the world, but does she ever think of how she would make this life ready to take this world with a confident heart and a mind that is sure, with a soul that believes?
Instead, we are left to conquer this world unassisted, alone, not in the cold meaning of the word, but rather the independent one. And by independence, I far from mean physical independence, for I (at twenty) am not yet physically independent from my parents, but I have mentally rebelled. I have rebelled.
This is not an invitation to rebel, though, nor is it a call to fight against parental authority, this is a call for change, and not for help, for I have found the one to save me, or rather, help me save myself. Not many of us need to be saved, and even less people need to be found, we are not lost, nor are we in a whirlwind of delusion. We are just distracted. The colorful world, and the bright lights, and the consumerism that has taken over our worlds; I want my coffee, and my book, and I want to achieve this worth-you-envy success when I grow up…all of our basic needs and our greatest aspirations; they have diverted us, and our focus, from the purpose, from our very first and the most defiantly important and longest of all quests we should seek in this life; who are we?

Who am I?
What do I want from this life?
What is my quest?
What am I looking for?
What impact do I want to have?

It leaves me in wonder; do we exist in a series of never ending questions? You answer one question, after so much pondering, nights of contemplation, days of failed attempts to meditate in the Cairo traffic and the thunderous pace of life, and you’re left with a part of the phenomenal creation you are, unveiled.

In our galaxy of a life, there’s always a star, worth of a whole constellation that was placed in your path to guide you. Yet sometimes, just sometimes, we overlook that wondrous star, shining with sincerity, only to come back to our senses, lucky enough to do that before we miss our chance, and hold this star high, regard it high, and treat it like the precious star it is. Because we all deserve to be guided, and we all deserve to answer the questions that bring us to the realization that our existence is remarkable. And that after all, neither of us is yet another face in the crowd.

Happy New Year Everyone!! 

Friday, December 26, 2008

Happy Holidays!

Have a very happy holiday season everyone, even though it is a bit Christmas-ly late..

Jeddah has been nice to me lately.
After having found out there were four fellow AIESECers currently in Jeddah (or rather Alumni, like myself), I met up and spent the day with them and it was actually so much fun!
Then the following day (which was yesterday), my sister got us invited to spend the day with a SAUDI ARABIAN friend of hers. It was actually my first time to meet a Saudi family; will give more details on that later on, nonetheless, it was fun.

I have been tagged by Erin Meagan of SeeYourVoice
The rules are :
1. Go to the 4th folder in your computer where you store your pictures.
2. Pick the 4th picture in that folder.
3. Explain the picture.
4. Tag 4 people to do the same!
The Picture: 
I apologize for the poor quality (my connection isn't helping me much)
The Explanation:
This picture was taken Summer of 2007 when my boyfriend and I first got together, in Alexandria, Egypt (this explains part of why I love the city so much). We were driving, and decided to stop and watch the sun setting into the very amazing Meditterenean. We placed the camera on the blocks of rocks behind us and voila!


Silly me was very excited by the fact that I go tagged, I forgot to tag four other people; so here it is:
  1. Afiori
  2. Hayek (because I know he has tons of amazing pictures)
  3. Inside the Cabinet of Wonder
  4. Sidenote:

Monday, December 22, 2008

Post 70: An Ode to Alexandria

Inspired by a book, a lot of people, a lot of love and a whole lot of homesickness.

The city that never sleeps.
The triumphant coast that never weeps.

A shore that has borne:
love and loss
Dreams; made and broken,
Alike it would toss.

dampen my soul with your mist and moisture,
Shape my horizon,
Like your natives' curvy posture.

Evenings of purple;
setting the sun free
Calling for happiness;
Nights of unmatched glee.

The city of wonder..
I grow hungry and fond,
exploring your every corner.

the shore history holds dear,
ignorant of what you plan for,
yet, unable to associate you with fear.

P.S. I KNOW the scale is messed up and the sentences aren't broken in the right places...but, like everything else, writing is at it's prettiest when raw; untouched. And apologies for the lack of pictures; I am currently stranded on the desert-esque land of Saudi Arabia (no offense) and am obliged to deal with a very slow, primitive dial up connection.

Please do let me what you think!

Saturday, December 13, 2008


I was going to make an update, then the internet decided to go all....slow on meand when I reloaded, the post got deleted.
So no I have decided that I won't post until I go back home; Cairo.
That should be on the 20th of December.
I miss my blog, and I am writing the entries as word documents for now because the internet connection we have here sucks.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

be back in a while

I'm leaving today so I won't be updating for a good 4 days at least.
Jeddah is boring. Or maybe it's the fact that I don't have any friends here, I know no one here, so it's just my family and I.
I am sort of scared I'll never go back home. And leave all the people behind. Scary thought.
Anyway, I thought I would say goodbye - or rather, see you next week?

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Bulleted Wednesday

  • My Blog List was somehow deleted, so I am starting from scratch. Please do leave links to your blog or suggest some.
  • Today is a very busy day: It is my little sister's 13th birthday! This is....freaky, by all means, because not only does it make me feel older, it also rubs it in, I don't think I remember how I was like at 13.
  • We leave today to go visit my father in Jeddah.
  • Last night, I just broke in tears as Mohammed was leaving( reason: aforementioned bullet/point)
  • I hate Egyptian press, I hate Egyptian lying...I hate how corrupt it all is. The person who murdered the girls is apparently born to very powerful, rich parents and so, now the murderer is miraculously a poor blue-collar worker who only wanted to rob them?
  • Dark chocolate is love!

  • Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.
    Provérbio sueco

  • With every small decision, you change a heart; you change a world.
    — Duncan Sheik

Monday, December 1, 2008

On a Brighter Note

Give it a though, or two.

A revolution only rises out of love. If you love a place enough, if you are devoted enough, you will make a revolution!

Isn't this true? So very true?

I'm leaving on Wednesday, and it has been possessing me; the thought: what if I never come back? I think of all the people I love, all the people I love and haven't told in a while...I think of leaving them behind with words and thoughts in my head that might remain unsaid. I love everyone that is close to me and I love my fellow bloggers.
I love things, too! I love books, and photographs and handwriting. I love found art, I love Moleskines. I love paper and pen. I love colors. I love music. I love being an older sister. And an eldest daughter and a grand daughter. I love how it soothes me when I hear my boyfriend sing. His voice has that amazing effect on me.
(Listen to the fourth song, same song but at the exact moment when I realized I love him!)

This a true moment of appreciation.

It is finally getting cold in Cairo! Now; the first of December.
Also, my best friend and I went out for sushi today; her treat (for a change haha); this is for you Mee: the Beatles quote.

Safe and Sound?

I am not trying to promote the wrong image of my country, nor am I trying to scare people; but this has to change, this has to be said.
Last week, two twenty-three year olds got KILLED. Killed not in an accident, this wasn't drunk driving, nor was it an overdose, they were brutally stabbed to death.
I don't care how they lived, who their friends were or what they did on a daily basis. I only care that this is not how two girls should die. This is not a matter of faith, my faith in God is endless, this is a matter of security, this is a matter of safety.
I didn't know them, but they were acquaintences of a friend of mine, and it's scary. It is scary to think that when you go to sleep at night, you could wake up missing a friend. Let alone that this friend got murdered; stabbed to death. What kind of man/woman would do that and for what freaking reason!!

I am sorry but my plans for pleaseant posts over the weekend got ruined. I will make nice posts, just not today.