Thursday, January 5, 2012

I Wrote This For You: The Book [Part 2: Moon]

Before I start writing this, I need to make it clear that this is more of how I feel and what I experience while reading the book. And I am reading it as slowly as I possibly can, because I don't want to finish it. This is what goes on in my mind as I read, and not your typical review. 

I am biased to this part of the book so far, because it starts with one of the best things I have ever read; my favorite IWFY post: The Children of Time.

I was born in August, and I always want to do the right thing, like my birth-month, I don't know what the right thing to do is. I lie about things. And I never want to apologize. I always lie to my boyfriend and I tell him that I don't want to see him on a specific day, but that is always a lie. Because I would always rather see him than not. I would always want to spend time with him, as much as I would appreciate spending time with myself or with other people.

"There are a million important things to do. But none as important as lying here next to you."

And Moon made it feel like it's okay. Like I am not the only one who does that, and that is the thing that matters the most: You are not alone. You are not the only one.

Moon is about the little things, and trust me, it's the little things that matter, it is the little things that make life worthwhile. And the little things happen all the time, every day, but most people just fail to notice them. Most people forget to remember that if they do notice the little things, they would be a lot happier.

Moon is about happiness.

"..No roller skating, kissing, smoking, fingers through hair, 3 am phone calls, stained letters, littering, unfeeling feelings, a smell left on a pillow, doors slammed, lyrics whispered, or loitering, Thank you."

I dare you to not relate to that. Moon is about the fear of falling in love, the fear that is at its peak right before you fall in love and then you succumb and you give in so willingly and you try to love the person to happiness, or more happiness and it's hard. Because you want that, and only that, and the fear is still there, the fear of losing what has always scared you.

This is how love doesn't make sense.

"A mess without you
Something beautiful with you."

"...till you cannot distinguish between being and being together"

And that is the scariest thought that anyone could think of. But it is so beautiful. Moon is beautiful. And so is love.

The moon is closer to earth than the sun, and this is why it has a stronger pull on its seas, but the sun, the sun gives us warmth, and gives the moon its light. Yet it's the moon that we could relate more to. It can never burn us.

Love hurts, over and over again because it is forgetful of who it has hurt before and we never learn. But every time your feelings become harder and harder to access. But on a night when the moon is full, you will give in and kiss that person that chose to be there. The person that chose to listen to you and support you when you never really ask for it. And it will be beautiful.

Whether it remains beautiful or not, however, is a matter of choice. A matter of accepting the fact that people change, and their place in your being is either reshaped or erased. Forever.


fezwork said...

The Children of Time is my favorite IWTFY entry as well. <3

Dinah. said...

"...till you cannot distinguish between being and being together"

You're a real writer.